October 4, 2015

27th Sunday in Ordinary Time  - A Reflection by Fr. Leo

 

Our first reading is taken from the second chapter of Genesis.  It is part of the second creation narrative, the second version of how the world was created.  The two stories are different and so cannot be literally true.  Not that it was ever intended to be understood in a literal way.  People knew creation took more than seven days.  It is beyond me how the creationist today can embrace such a childish understanding of creation as a seven day event.  Anyway, we also know it was a story about the first man and first woman because it is just that, a story.  A story requires language and only after a long period of time are symbols developed to “write” the oral word down.  Given the linguistic skills of the writers of Genesis and the time it took for humanity to get to that point in communication, we know that the first man and woman would have been long deceased and forgotten.  What we have then is a story that was written to communicate an understanding of a God who created all things and breathed life into them. 

 

Today’s first reading talks about an innate attraction that most men and women have for the opposite sex.  A reality so powerful it brings a man to seek a woman and make a life with her and bring children into the world.  This is understood as a sacred desire that creates natural bonds between a couple.  And society respects this bond so that it may live in peace and order, respecting existing relationships of the committed.  I think we get that.  Deep down we know it is not good for us to be alone.  We need others and for most, a relationship that is both physical and spiritual.  This is the ideal, but we know that many couples who start out with great expectations, find themselves alone again after a year or twenty years. We must not judge this, for there can be many reasons for separation.  When a mature and healthy relationship is not created in the beginning, because of one or both of the parties, we cannot wonder why it did not last.  This is not to say that marriage is not hard work at times and many older couples, who are very much in love today, can talk about the refiners fire they have experienced over the years.  However, there are times when separation is the only healthy option for all involved in marriage relationships, couple and children included.  I recently talked to a man who’s children finally told him he should divorce because his unhappiness was bringing them all down and they could see that there was going to be no reconciliation. 

 

Recently I finished a book titled, “Emotional Intelligence,” written in 1995.  The author makes a convincing argument that a high IQ is useless, even painful to have, it there is not a development of emotional intelligence.  What is sad is that we live in a time when a narrow set of skills are recognized and valued in our educational system.  We are all about teaching knowledge, but we are not paying attention to the development of empathy and compassion in our youth.  So how can we expect people today to enter lasting relationships when the most important building block of relationships has been ignored by the education system and our society in general, the institution of the Church included. 

 

What I think we can take away from our scriptures this weekend is that relationships are key to a healthy and holy life.  To have healthy relationships we must have reverence for others and ourselves, and make the effort that is needed to build empathetic and compassionate relationships with others.  There is a deep longing for this kind of relationship in each of us that we must honor and we are wise to ask God to help us know his presence in our relationship with others, ourselves and God. To grow in one area of relationship is to grow in the others. To know others we must know ourselves and to know ourselves opens the door for knowing God and vice versa.  Let us then be grateful for the good friends we have and ask God do deepen our love in all our relationships. 

 

The message here is for all peoples, regardless of orientation.  Some theologians point out that this God given desire to be one with another is a natural gift from God found in ‘nature.”  This moral foundation of understanding God’s gift of attraction applies to all since this desire is not chosen, but part of nature-creation, and what God created he looked at and said, without qualification……it is good!